There is no doubt about it, being around toxic people can be draining, and become rather uncomfortable for anyone. If you find yourself spending time with a friend, or a loved one who literally sucks the energy right out of you it’s time to put a little distance between that person, or that situation, immediately. It’s troublesome for most of us, because we may think a person is good for us, or the feelings we have for someone may be so strong that we don’t want to let go, because we don’t want to hurt them.
The problem here though is the fact that being in a relationship, or holding on to a friendship with someone who isn’t good for your well-being is quite frankly a very unhealthy and unproductive way of living. And, yes it’s important to put yourself first sometimes, especially when it comes to matters such as this.
Sometimes it may not be easy to tell right away who is toxic in your life, and who is not, but if the person that comes to mind now possess any of the qualities below you should definitely cut this person loose and move on with your life.
1. They interrupt you every time you begin to speak and never take your repeated advice.
2. Everything is one-sided. They do not take your point of view into consideration.
3. When they call or you get together they only talk about themselves, never to stop and ask how you are doing or listen to your thoughts, ideas or opinions.
4. The thought of being with them does not excite you, instead it makes you tired. Like literally just thinking about spending time with this person makes you physically tired.
5. You don’t enjoy doing the same types of things.
6. It’s difficult to relate with them on any level.
7. Instead of building you up and making you feel empowered or inspired this person makes you feel bad about yourself, like you don’t live up to an expectation or standard. Which is so uncool, because no one should ever make you feel that way.
8. You never feel like a priority to this person. They typically make you feel like a backup plan and hang out with you only when nothing better has come along.
Example (a recent text I received): “I’m not sure what I’m doing today, tomorrow or the day after, but I’ll let you know what’s going on and when I have some time to get together.”
If you get something like that you should just put down your phone and walk away. Do not even respond to such a thing.
9. You’ve often wondered why you still keep this person in your life and you’re still not really sure the reasons why…
10. They are a bad influence on you and push you do things that challenge your moral beliefs, make bad decisions and make you uncomfortable.
11. You are always the one making time for this person and it never seems to be the other way around.
12. They are only available when you have something to offer them, something they want.
13. They do not value your time, or care if you have anything else you need to do on a given day. They soak up all your time leaving you feeling stuck and putting your priorities on the back burner.
14. They are expensive to hang out with. You can’t just chill with this person without spending a ton of cash.
15. Your other friends do not want to be around this person for reasons you just push to the side, but they probably have a very valid point to why this person isn’t all that welcome to come hang with the group…
16. This person contributes to an over-indulgence of gossip, and discussions about other people and their personal business, none of which is anyone’s business.
17. They take advantage of you and feel no guilt for it, at all. Forget even getting an apology from this person, it is very unlikely they will even understand why they should apologize for anything.
18. It’s like the Niagara Falls of negativity raining down on you every time they are around. Duck and cover! Get outta there, quick! You’re going to need a strong umbrella to shield all that negativity coming down on you.
19. When they give you advice about a certain thing it makes you feel completely undermined and well, stupid.
20. They are selfish in more ways than one. If it doesn’t benefit them, forget it.
21. They are the Queen/King of Manipulation.
22. They often get jealous for silly/petty things.
23. They do not support you.
24. They are untrustworthy.
25. They are possessive and get jealous when you hang out with other friends or leave them out of a conversation or outing.
26. They create and carry around a train of never-ending drama that you find completely ridiculous and self-destructive.
27. They get themselves in situations that they can rarely step up and get out of by themselves. Leaving you feeling guilty if you don’t step in and help them out.
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